I'm like so sick of how things are revolving around my love life. I really wonder if Cupid is doing his job or does he hate me. Nevertheless... I should have known better. Maybe I should just stop fighting against destiny and accept what has been foretold during my childhood.
I've tried so hard to make things work in all the relationships I'm in and especially more so after Valene. I really understood the true meaning of staying true and faithful but yet things still turned sour in the end. It doesn't matter anymore. I figured that maybe I should really stay single and try to enjoy the benefits it reaps. However, it is not as easy as I thought so for I yearn for someone to hold and love me and appreciate the things that make me Danny. No one wants to be lonely.
Regarding Mel and I? All I can say is that, if it happens, it happens. She doesn't want to rush things and she really doesn't want to get into any relationship till she graduates. I respect that and with that decided, I too wanna draw a clearer line as to where this 'relationship' stands. I seriously do not wish for another equivocal relationship. I think this is the best for us both. Moreover she's so stressed out by all these that it hurts me in various ways.
---------------------------I got screwed badly by Wendy... she said some very very nasty things about me... All I can say is that my conscience is clear and I gave my best and put my heart into reproducing the alternative collection. If she strongly feels that I'm that bad a person... so be it. I may not have physical proof of my medical state except for my appointment card but I do have people who know of the countless nights I burnt and days I spent drawing...
---------------------------I spent the whole day at JMD and just chilled and had fun after finishing my 'work'. After dinner with the juniors at S11, Merlion, Steve, Selphie and I went to M.O.S. to club. Jae and Jess joined us there when Jae knew it was free entry. It was pretty empty at first and the music wasn't pumping at the main floor thus we went to Fashion Bar to chill first.
It was pretty darn crowded when we got back at 12.30am and I even met Lerine. I did have fun overall but as Jae and Jess left early and the rest fading into the shadows as they became tired & bored I too lost my mood. I understand that being at Retro Room all the way does kill the mood. Hahahaha! Merlion, Steve, Selphie and I left for Marina Square's Hong Kong Cafe at 2.30am and we sure killed time there talking bout various stuff.
We took the 1st train home and I started on redoing the Get-Up & Go for Wendy. She called me early in the morning asking me about it. I thought since I need to send to her, I may as well make it better... Thus I stayed at the Com for 2 hours before packing my stuff for Basketball at C.C.C..
I reached C.C.C. at 11.45am and I was surprised to see so many people. I was asked to substitute my friend when they spotted me walking over and I had to play before even warming up. "Its up to you Dan. We're losing, score is 20 to 10. Get on the court and win this!" I do enjoy this faith that my bball mates have in me as it affirms that my skills are kinda back and I can play.
I was really very tired that day as I haven't slept for 2 whole nights and had done much physical stuff too but I was all pumped up mentally and didn't want to disappoint the guys. I wanted to defend our home-ground and honour. We did win that game and the subsequent ones as the opponents found it tough to defend against me. Well, Vic called me Steve Nash that day though they always said I was the Iverson of the Sunday morning crew.
I spent the rest of the day doing a little window shopping and visiting and then meeting up with Zat and XM to catch up. That's about it for the past few days. I really enjoy my life now but somewhat ironically the emptiness in me is growing. Hopefully I won't be consumed by the darkness within me. God Bless people!!